Delegation meets Deepika Padukone, requests her to date a politician

A delegation comprising NGO representatives, social and citizen rights activists and paid volunteers met alleged actor Deepika Padukone and urged her to date a politician this year. It may be remembered that today is Deepika’s birthday.

Why did you wake me up
so early?
 The delegation reached Deepika’s Bangalore residence at about 7 am today and asked the security staff to request the serial dater to come down and meet them. The delegation got the shock of their lives when a groggy-faced Deepika came down and met them. Till this point, the delegation only had 20 members but as and when Deepika stepped outside her gate, the numbers simply swelled with over 100 people joining. Some even painted banners on the spot to appear legitimate. Since many were not aware of the issue being raised by the ‘genuine activists’, the fake ones created posters and banners on issues ranging from global warming to North Korean missile tests.

“She has unique superpowers. She can alter the destiny of anyone. I have read emails forwarded by friends and seen Facebook photos which bear testimony to this fact. She can date anyone to doom and we want to leverage this superpower to neutralise many vested interests that are acting against the nation and its people,” a spokesperson for the delegation said.  

The delegation spoke to Deepika and apprised her of the benefits India stands to gain if she starts dating politicians. “We have even prepared a list of politicians who are harming the nation. We are talking about MPs who are sitting in parliament and misusing their power, position and privileges. We would request you to pick one of these politicians and go around for a while till such a time that their bank balance or power or standing in the society vanishes,” an activist said.
Deepika blessing Saif Ali Khan before
his marriage with Kareena Kapoor

Deepika heard the delegation patiently and took the list of politicians prepared by them and assured the gathering that she will consider their request. “I will revert on this. Right now I want to win the Nargislal Cheddibhai award for best actress and that’s my top priority. This one will follow,” she said and went back to her house. The delegation meanwhile dispersed with majority of people heading home and uploading pics of Deepika on FB and twitter.

Times Now editor in chief Arnab 'the nation wants to know' Goswami meanwhile sent her birthday wishes with a bouquet and a card. The card said "Why aren't you dating a politician, Ms Padukone? The nation wants to know, the nation seeks to know and your channel will not rest till we find out".


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