Indian government will delay joining date for new president, VP to be on the bench


Times will be tough for the
new incumbent
Nearly a month after a few IT companies delayed their fresher on-boarding plan, instability in the economic environment and slowdown in tax collections have forced the Indian government to postpone the joining date for the new president. Sources in the finance ministry have confirmed the development and added that a decision to this effect has been taken at the highest level in the government.

The next pres?
Sources have also told Humor Unplugged that a Government Order on this has already been issued and is currently being circulated among the concerned departments. The offer letter to the new president will be issued 90 days after the elections are over and the government also drive a bargain on the president's take home salary. The practice of issuing tax saving food coupons to presidents (which allowed the president to dine at a few restaurants and buy food items from supermarkets) will also be discontinued from this year onwards.

In addition, the government has also decided to move the yet to be elected vice president to the ‘bench’. This means that the new VP will only be paid for the hours he serves as the chairman of the Rajya Sabha on a 'session-to-session' basis. He might also be paid extra for the hours spent updating the Facebook page of the president (his primary function) and get a per diem for attending funerals overseas.

“These are part of the austerity measures announced by the government. Both the posts are cost centres for the government and are largely ceremonial in nature and symbolic in function. In the future, we may even replace many them with bots or Siri/Google Now type AI applications that will not just talk positive to the media but also take better decisions,” a senior bureaucrat told Humor Unplugged.

The bureaucrat also said that the Government may do away with another ceremonial post called the 'Chief Economic Advisor'.=

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