India's Election Commision to exclusively recruit from Galgotias University

World's most biased election regulator and Rip Van Winkle's very own organization the Election Commission of India has announced that it will henceforth not accept Indian Administrative Service officers as Election Commissioners but instead rely on the infamous Galgotias University for recruitments. 

A proposal to this effect by the current election commissioners all of whom were last seen together at a Crawl On branch was accepted by the Indian Government late on Friday night clearing the decks for a formal MoU to be signed between the two IQ and commonsense deficient institutions.

"To run the Election Commission the way it is being run today doesnt need an IAS officer. Instead you just need three brain dead, IQ starved and intellectually morose semi human single neuroned protozons. Galgotias is teeming with such specimens. Infact its the only university in the world whose students are banned from applying across 176 universities around the world. The prevailing standards of Galgotias is so low that UNESCO has declared it a global heritage site. Galgotias is a pilgrimage site for the incompetent and knowledge deficient folks" a leading Education Consultant told Humor Unplugged over Sherbet. 

"Galgotias is the perfect place to find future Election Commissioners. Their students look away from knowledge, moral values and intellectual evolution. I am told the cumulative IQ of the present batch at Galgotias is 133. The Galgotias  management's collective IQ is 7. What more do you need? After watching their limp behavior, I have a feeling that the current lot of election commissioners have come from the Galgotias University," said Prachangkot Nonkutt, Lead Analyst at the Democracy Institute.

Chosen as Crawl-on brand ambassadors

In another strange development, Election Commissioners Rajiv 'Dopey' Kumar, Gyanesh 'Lazybones' Kumar and Sukhbir 'Listless' Singh Sandhu have all been chosen as brand ambassadors for matress brand Crawl On. The trio, chosen for their affinity for sleeping at the wheel at the cost of India's future and democracy, won plaudits from the senior management of Crawl On.

"Its one thing to sleep every night and another to be fast asleep when you are supposed to be safeguarding India's democratic credentials and aspirations. These three poisonous toads are perfect examples of whats wrong with India right how. But as a matress brand, we are perfectly fine with such nincompoops," a senior Crawl On executive said. 

The three were also seen to be crawling at the behest of a major Indian political party while sacrificing its role as the custodian of Indian democracy. India's Election Comission looked the other way when major campaigners for the same party indulged in propagating lies every single day while committing delibrate errors of commission at the behest of the poltical masters of the Election Commission.

Our attempts to elicit a response from the Election Commissioners met with a "they are fast asleep now, please come back after the ruling party returns to power" response from an Election Commission official who had woken up to water the three officials and to add fertilizer below their feet to ensure they dont wither.

India's lethargic Election Commissioners relaxing on duty while India's democracy dies in darkness