Navika Kumar is India's new Consul General in San Francisco

Days after the Indian consulate in San Francisco was attacked by pakistani stooge khalistanis, India has decided to act tough. In a series of steps to be taken to protect the structure and to deter paid brainless khalistani freaks, Indian government has shown its desire to send a clear message. 

In a yet to be released highly confidential press note seen by Humor Unplugged at a Falafal joint in San Jose, the following steps have been listed as priority measures to be deployed immediately to safeguard the consulate:

* Times Now anchor and Mososaurian mother in law Navika Kumar will be replacing the current counsel general T.V. Nagendra Prasad who has been recalled. Prasad will now be the regional head for logistics for Food Corporation of India's Tawang branch. 

* Navika Kumar will report to duty with her gym equipment and sans make up. The TV screens outside will also play clips from her shows on Times Now including the famous one where she scrambles chinese names. This move is designed to scare away paid khalistani reptiles that want to damage the property at the behest of pakistani numbskulls. 

* A Baba Ramdev organic store selling mango root noodles, banana stem biscuits, cyanobacteria  sandwich, neem pizza and packaged methane will be set up in the perimeter of the consulate as the first line of Defense. 

* The second line of defense will be a wall made up of papers containing new taxes proposed by the finance ministry. The wall will be 10 feet high and 900 cms thick. 

* Navika will be the third line of defense. Her presence is sure to scare and deter cowardly pilistanis. 

"I will get them married"

Speaking on her approach to secure the consulate, Navika said "these people are just frustrated youth who are simply free of any vocation. I can play the matchmaker and get them married so that they have better things to worry about. I plan to get all the khalistani minions married by the end of the year after that they will be so busy washing utensils that they won't have any time to spare for destructive activities."

Meanwhile, in response to the developments, the neon-brained khalistani rubber salsa force spokesperson Gabbar issued a statement from his hiding place under his bed in his downtown SFO sty. "I will talk to my masters in Rawalpindi and issue a formal statement. Till then, I pray to my media friends not to reveal my hiding location to that Cretaceous auntylosaurian theropod Navika Kumar," he said before slithering away into a crevice.  

Meanwhile Pakistani foreign minister Mullah Gomar who is trying hard to settle down in US has condemned the move. "If these measures are true, then we will be left with no option but to approach the UNHCR headed ably by human rights champion china," he said. China has called for a meeting to discuss the issue as soon as it puts down an ongoing rebellion in Occupied Tibet. 

Navika Kumar testing a weapon at the San Francisco consulate