China has launched a spy balloon to track EPF interest credit in India: Government

The Indian finance ministry has claimed that a Chinese spy balloon was spotted over the ministry's headquarters at Cabinet Secretariat, Raisina Hill in New Delhi on Friday. The ministry lost no time in claiming that the Unidentified Funny Object (UFO) was a Chinese spy balloon launched to keep track of the hard work the ministry's employees are doing in ensuring the timely disbursement of EPF interest to all EPFO subscribers across the country. 

Chavvani Lal, who is the babu in charge of disbursing the due interest, had lost the files pertaining to the interest rates for the last two years and is said to have finally located the file in his Pan spitoon earlier this week. This gave many EPFO subscribers the hope that the interest will finally be credited to their accounts sometime soon.  This was around the time many finance ministry employees lazing around in Raisina Hill park located the huge balloon which was hovering exactly over the ministry. 

"I had almost fallen asleep after a light meal of just 25 pooris and 10 Rasagullas and that is when I saw that balloon which almost looked anchored to our building.  I immediately rushed to inform our minister. I was so fast that I covered the distance of 500 mts in almost 77 minutes. My Fitbit was warning me to slow down but I didn't pay any attention to it. I kept on moving till I reached madam's (Nirmala Sitharaman) chamber and collapsed," a senior babu in the ministry said while describing the sequence of events.

"We at once assembled on the roof and even called the Ministry of Defense. But they in turn asked us about when the EPF interest due will be credited and cut the call. Thus, we were forced to do the investigation on our own. When we did that we found that the balloon was a Chinese one and had come to spy on our work with the EPFO. We came to this conclusion after analyzing the shape of the balloon and its speed and direction," a finance ministry official said.   

China according to the ministry is keeping track of the disbursement of interest to EPFO subscribers. 

Meanwhile, the ministry has used this event as a pretext to delay the credit of interest rates further. 

"In light of these developments, we are forced to delay the disbursal of interest further in the national interest.  A fresh date for disbursal of interest will be communicated in 2029," a ministry communique said. 

Meanwhile, news agency Aaj Tak, broadcasting from a psychiatric facility, claimed that the Chinese spy balloon had a secret chip inside it with which it could pick up VVIP movement in the national capital. They also claimed that the ballon was equipped with laser GPS diverting software using which China could control traffic in New Delhi.  

The Chinese spy balloon spotted on top of
the finance ministry