Britney Spears' father Jamie Spears joins Myanmar military government

Notorious scammer, evil villain, and father of Britney Spears, Jamie Spears has been recruited by the Myanmar Army. An announcement on this was made by the Myanmar military spokesperson Khumbikana Khaw in Naypyidaw yesterday. Spears will be joining the coup administration of Myanmar in the capacity of 'National Conservatorship of the people of Myanmar'.

Jamie Spears, it may be noted is the same individual who is trying to keep Britney in his control to take charge of the earnings of the pop star. A much hated and loathed figure, Jamie Spears has made it his life's mission to live off the earnings of his daughter on one pretext or another. 

According to sources, the HR (Harassment Resources) team of the Myanmar Army approached Jamie Spears in early March to join them as a consultant with wide-ranging responsibilities. Spears will be responsible for managing jailed protestors and other detainees who are being prosecuted by the Myanmar Army for standing up to the junta regime that stole democracy from the citizens of Myanmar. 

Jamie Spears

"I am delighted to take over this new role. As a lifelong control freak and an award-winning bully, I have always identified with military regimes be it in Myanmar, Iraq, or even Panama. In my soggy books, democracy is for wimps and smooth-skinned non-motile protozoans what we need as human beings is someone who keeps bashing weaklings and gets their thinking aligned to what is decided by a strong set of bullies," Spears said before slithering away. Spears is expected to take over mid-March and he will be flying to Naypyidaw this Saturday (13th March).

Jamie Spears has already got his welcome kit from the Myanmar Army. The kit includes a whip, three fake passports, a photoshop license, XXL Myanmar Army t shirt, a cyanide capsule, and a kerchief made of a fossil mountain goat's beard.   

"Myanmar Army is happy to announce that the honorable Jamie Spears will be joining us soon," an announcement from the army spokesperson Khaw's  office said.