Spying, hacking, IP theft and overall meddling in geopolitical affairs almost back to normal: China

In a sign of things improving for China, Commie Progress Wielder Xi Ninepin today claimed that his country’s recovery from Covid-19 was almost complete.

“I am hysterical and overflowing with joy as I report that we are now back to normal. By normal I mean hacking and stealing data, intruding into neighbor’s territories, and irritating the global community in general. Just a few days ago we were threatened by an island nation in the pacific when we tried to infringe on their sovereignty and if that is not a sign of good times, I don’t know what is,” said Xi Ninepin.

China recently celebrated
Global Irritation Day 2020

In addition to spreading Covid-19, China has been bothering its neighbors and selling cheap junk in the name of PPE equipment. To put things in perspective, over 59 percent of people around the world want China to be expunged from the global community of nations, its occupied territories freed and a travel ban to be imposed on that country. Previously, China indulged in nuclear proliferation, propped up rogue states, and even sold melamine-contaminated milk. China views all this as part of its normal behavior.    

China also celebrated Global Irritation Day on July 19, 2020. This day is dedicated to Chinese citizens and armed forces personnel who have caused multiple problems to other countries and people in the past. 

“If things continue getting better, we will be back to selling melamine contaminated milk, lead contaminated nuclear weapons and expanding the nine dash line to include Guam. We are also enjoying the trouble that Coronavirus has caused to nations around the world. I am so thrilled that yesterday we gave breakfast to our gulag inmates for the first time in 3 years,” Ninepin added.