China lays claim on new Japanese island

A new volcanic island has poked its head above the surface of the ocean for the first time near Japan. but even before the island got a name, Asia’s perennial headache China, laid claim to the island and the resources on it.

The island was discovered when smoke was seen on the horizon and the coastguard went to see what was going on. Rather than finding a ship on fire, the volcanic island was discovered. As soon as the news spread, China got ready with a set of quickly created bogus papers which allegedly showed the presence of intruding Han Chinese on the island dating back to the 11th century. Chinese were not at all bothered by the fact that the island popped out just 43 hours back.

China also lost no time in sending an intrusive twin engine propeller driven poke plane over the island and threatened to wage a 1000 year long war (Pakistan style) if the island was not brought under Chinese occupation within the next 24 hours. The intrusive plane however scooted as soon Japan scrambled F 16s to chase it.

The new volcanic island off Japanese coast

“This island has had Chinese settlers since the 11th century and so it belongs to China and no one else,” a Chinese foreign ministry spokesperson said. There was no official reaction to the dubious Chinese claim from the Japanese government. But speaking on the condition of anonymity, a Japanese Ministry of Foreign Affairs official said “the Chinese need to stop smoking weed before issuing statements on territorial issues. It is not amusing or funny anymore”