India hits back at China; to offer spit pasted visas to travelers from Tibet, Xinjiang and Inner Mongolia

After years of putting up with diaper tantrums thrown by insecure commies from China, India has decided to pay China back using its own coins. Just days after China issued stapled visas to Indian citizens from Arunachal Pradesh, India has decided to issue not stapled, neither pinned, but spit pasted visas to travelers from countries occupied illegally by China. In effect India has recognized that these are nations that have been subjected to illegal occupation by a colonial China.

“We have a bought a machine that can spit paste visas to Chinese passports.

The spit is created artificially using organic waste generated from the parliament canteen. The idea is not to humiliate people from these areas but to remind China that India reserves its right to, and can pay China back in its own insecure currency. We are not even going to be stapling these visas or pinning them with rusted pins. It will simply be pasted at the back of the passports issued by the colonial Chinese government,” a senior bureaucrat in the External Affairs ministry told Humor Unplugged.  

China meanwhile reacted angrily to the development. It has recalled its Ambassador in New Delhi and PLA’s own newspaper The Hindu’s editor to Beijing for ‘discussions’. An article in commie mouthpiece Global Times simply said 'grrr". Seems like the Chinese were at loss for words; flummoxed as they were at this unexpected move.

US President Obama urged both sides to act with extreme restraint. “I have personally eavesdropped on phone conversations on both sides and was taken aback by the level of rhetoric being tossed around. I think we need to deescalate the situation soon and I will soon dispatch Pakistan’s foreign secretary John Kerry to Beijing and New Delhi,” Obama said.