Chennai Express script files go missing

In what could be termed as an unbelievable development, Shah Rukh Khan owned Red Chilies Entertainment has claimed that the files related to the script for the movie Chennai Express were no longer in its possession. The claim was made in response to a Hebus Scriptus filed in local court in Mumbai by a group that is considered close to alleged director Mahesh Bhatt.

“Red Chillies has informed the highly honorable and worship worthy court that the script for the movie was no longer available with our firm. The files are currently missing and we have instituted an inquiry to be conducted by a committee headed by a retired Bollywood critic to investigate the incident and recover the missing files. We have also purchased a few clean chits, just in case few people are found guilty,” a Red Chilies spokesperson said.

When told that the movie Chennai Express was made without a proper script, Shah Rukh Khan got angry and got into a fight with a watchman at the press club office in Lower Parel.  “I have never made a single movie in my life without a proper script. Even Ra.One had a proper script that was written by a 2 year old. These allegations are baseless and are made by a few people who are jealous of the success of the movie. Such people should take a cold shower and move on,” Shah Rukh Khan said.

Meanwhile Humor Unplugged has learnt that the Mahesh Bhatt camp has decided to pursue the case till the matter is resolved. The camp feels that Chennai Express was indeed made without a script – a privilege available only to Bhatt’s production house that can make movies with an invisible script or one that is shorter than a grocery bill. “We have patented the process of producing movies without a script and no one can copy that without our permission,” a senior Bhatt camp member said.  

UPA chairperson Sonia Gandhi is reportedly upset with the development and asked PM Manmohan Singh to look into the matter.