Pakistan test fires tea stall missile

In a bid to intimidate its ‘enemy’ Pakistan has come up with a unique missile that can be launched from a local beverage stall.

The missile (Beta name: Ahmek-e-Haqqani) was tested fired in the presence of Pakistan army hierarchy on Friday at an undisclosed location in Baluchistan. Humor Unplugged, one of the few blogs which was present at the launch was quite impressed by the missile which can travel a distance of over 2 kms and create a fog thick enough to allow the Pak armymen to retreat in a hurry.

The missile

“God willing this missile will give us enough time to go back to safety and chill while the enemy is at our doorstep. Since we have many tea vending machines and stalls within our formations, it is an ideal fire and run,” a senior Pak army officer said.

Former Pak army chief Gen Parvez Musharraf, who was hiding in a laundry basket in his exile home in London said “this is a perfect counterbalance to India’s cold start strategy. One minute we will be sipping tea and the next minute we will be firing missiles and fleeing like there is no tomorrow. This project was initiated under my leadership and I am glad to see it turn into a reality today. In the good old days when I was fighting there was no way of escaping our enemy – it was either capture or surrender. But this missile and the tea stall based-launcher will give us more options”.

Pakistan is now planning to raise 3 companies comprising of tea stall owners who will man the new missile launch platform. Sources in the Pak army said that the corps commanders were considering arming all tea stall owners across Pakistan's border with India with the missile launch platform. The missile will be inducted by 2013, the source informed.