Ways to get into Delhi University

Delhi University has announced that students will need 100 percent marks to get into the first cut-off list for various programmes in its affiliated colleges. Now this is indeed remarkable but as usual there’s nothing to worry. We give you ways to get around this rule. Here we go.

• Why join as a student, when you can easily join as a faculty member?
• Route your admission form through Mauritius or Cayman Islands
• Book your seat through Snapdeal.com and get a 35 pc discount on marks
• Book seats in bulk and get 25 percent off
• Date the vice-chancelor’s kid
• Say that you will ‘repay’ the remaining percentage as EMI over the next few years
• Become a politician or an actor and DU will chase you with a doctorate
• Say that you live in the same cell in Tihar as Kannimozhi\Kalmadi
• Get into Bangalore University and seek a transfer
• Go for their ‘no-frills’ low percentage service – correspondence
• Become an academic consultant to DU
• Threaten them in Arnab Goswami style with 33 questions