Team BCCI will find it tough to win World Cup 2011
Humor Unplugged’s very own psychoanalyst Dr. Hammerschmidst has analyzed the events leading to the ICC World Cup 2011 in detail and prepared a report that explains what went wrong from the BCCI team’s perspective. The report has been submitted to the BCCI and the Indian government. The opposition has already asked the Indian government to constitute a JPC to investigate the episode.
According to the report, the BCCI’s cricket team’s chances in the World Cup have been reduced by many blunders committed by various stakeholders in the last 50 days. Your favorite blog has managed to obtain a copy of the report by bribing a senior union minister. Here are the main reasons why Indian team will have it tough in the 2011 edition of cricket World Cup.
* Comparing the current team with its 1983 counterpart: “Definitely not a good idea. Simply shows that we just don’t want to move on from that win. This mistake has been repeated before every World Cup since 1983 and the team could never live up to the expectations. Things got so worse this year that some individuals were compared with members from the cup wining team and media pulling out many members of Kapil’s team out of wilderness and doing countless interviews,” the doc says.
* Shankar, Ehsaan and Loy: According to the doc, “this trio has been giving the BCCI’s cricket team nightmares since the 1999 World Cup. Every WC since 1999, these three have been composing absolute duds in a futile attempt to create a inspiring anthem for the BCCI team. The result has been but shoddy, insipid numbers that have failed to capture the imagination of fans”.
* Ad overdose by key players. “Typically players should have avoided appearing in ads 45 days prior to the cup. This would have helped them focus on the game, helped ease some pressure on the players as their visibility would have been reduced and also assured the nation that the players are more serious about the game than ads” Hammerschmidst says.
* Media should have avoided the players till the finals.
* Movie stars should never have been roped in to encourage BCCI's team.
* Every time a BCCI team captain has endorsed a cola brand, before the World Cup, the team has performed badly
To support his study, Dr. Hammerschmidst cites the example of the team that won the T20 World Cup in 2007. “No one believed that the BCCI’s team will win the cup in 2007 and so there were no comparisons, the advertisers avoided them and the nation went about its business as if nothing was happening and that’s the way the team will be able to bring the cup home - get it?,” asks Dr. Hammerschmidst.
According to the report, the BCCI’s cricket team’s chances in the World Cup have been reduced by many blunders committed by various stakeholders in the last 50 days. Your favorite blog has managed to obtain a copy of the report by bribing a senior union minister. Here are the main reasons why Indian team will have it tough in the 2011 edition of cricket World Cup.
* Comparing the current team with its 1983 counterpart: “Definitely not a good idea. Simply shows that we just don’t want to move on from that win. This mistake has been repeated before every World Cup since 1983 and the team could never live up to the expectations. Things got so worse this year that some individuals were compared with members from the cup wining team and media pulling out many members of Kapil’s team out of wilderness and doing countless interviews,” the doc says.
* Shankar, Ehsaan and Loy: According to the doc, “this trio has been giving the BCCI’s cricket team nightmares since the 1999 World Cup. Every WC since 1999, these three have been composing absolute duds in a futile attempt to create a inspiring anthem for the BCCI team. The result has been but shoddy, insipid numbers that have failed to capture the imagination of fans”.
* Ad overdose by key players. “Typically players should have avoided appearing in ads 45 days prior to the cup. This would have helped them focus on the game, helped ease some pressure on the players as their visibility would have been reduced and also assured the nation that the players are more serious about the game than ads” Hammerschmidst says.
* Media should have avoided the players till the finals.
* Movie stars should never have been roped in to encourage BCCI's team.
* Every time a BCCI team captain has endorsed a cola brand, before the World Cup, the team has performed badly
To support his study, Dr. Hammerschmidst cites the example of the team that won the T20 World Cup in 2007. “No one believed that the BCCI’s team will win the cup in 2007 and so there were no comparisons, the advertisers avoided them and the nation went about its business as if nothing was happening and that’s the way the team will be able to bring the cup home - get it?,” asks Dr. Hammerschmidst.
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Coffee is on me. It actually is...need to change my shirt now