China deploys CSS-5 missiles on India border, India mobilizes Mayawati

China, according to Pentagon sources, has moved its new advanced long range CSS-5 missiles close to its border with India. It has also developed plans to mobilize its air force at a short notice in the event of hostilities breaking out between India and China. Our respected defense minister meanwhile has assured all Indians that the country was more than prepared to meet any threats from China or any bigger or meaner nation.

“We have nothing to worry about. The moment they (Peoples Liberation Army) move in, the chief of Common Wealth Games Organizing Committee Mr Suresh Kalmadi will welcome them with an inflated bill of USD 1254 billion to cover invasion costs. Further, we have asked UP CM Mayawati to work from the India-China border for a while. She is our most potent weapon and we have asked her to face China for a while. In case China even tries to eye our land, Mayawati will walk across to China and give them a piece of her mind,” said defense minister A K Anthony.

China meanwhile has condemned the move to deploy Mayawati on the Indo-China border. “This no good. Mayawati no good..it no help Indi-Chini friendship and it lead to biiiig boo boo. India need to move Mayawati back to where she belong,” a senior Chinese foreign ministry spokesperson said.  China has also issued a poster asking its neighbors to part with territory to satiate the growing appetite for land. The poster, a copy of which was accessed by Humor Unplugged, is modeled on Uncle Sam poster and intended to send out a clear message to China's neighbors.

The poster issued by the Chinese foreign ministry circulated among China's neighboring countries