Pakistan announces new terror team to target Commonwealth Games

Close on the heels of the visit of Indian home minister P Chidambaram, Pakistan has announced a 12 member squad to continue and augment its terror activities in India. The team, nominated jointly by Pakistan’s ISI, Taliban and army contains some of the big names in the field of terrorism and sneaky warfare and is expected to commence work soon.

The team includes:

Maulana Masood Azhar (C) 
Zaki-ur-Rehman Lakhvi (VC)
Yusuf Muzammil
Abdul Karim Tunda
Mohammed Ibrahim Athar Alvi
Anwar Ahmed Haji
Abu-Al-Qama
Shahid Akhtar Sayed
Mohammed Ahmed Dossa
Riyaz Abu Bhakar Khatri
Mohammed Yusuf Shah alias Saluddin
Zahoor Ibrahim Mistri (12th man)
Dawood Ibrahim (Manager)
Hafiz Sayeed (Coach)

Among other things, this team has been tasked with carrying out terror attacks to disrupt the upcoming Commonwealth Games in New Delhi. Dawood Ibrahim has been asked by the ISI to arrange a meet soon to discuss and finalize the KRAs for each team member. Humor Unplugged has learnt that Pakistan is in a hurry to carry out a terror attack soon and has putting tremendous pressure on terror groups controlled by ISI and its army. “India has again started talking to us and this means that they want a terror attack on their territory and we have to oblige them. Besides, its been a while since we organized a massive attack on their soil and the boys here are raring to go. In fact, I was told that the sleeper cells that we have created in India with much difficulty have actually gone to sleep,” says Hafiz Sayeed, coach of the terror team.