New strains of flu...

In light of the swine flu, Governments around the world have issued advisory to their citizens. The Indian government has also issued a warning about possible flu variants that may strike the country in the days to come. Here’s the exclusive list:


Varun flu: (strain H1N3): This strain spreads via election rallies and CDs. This strain becomes extremely virulent around elections when it realizes that it is a nobody and cannot do anything on its own.

Maya flu: (strain H2N5): Spreads through statues and monuments converted into malls. Needs huge sums of money to survive and thrives on scaring opponents using NSA and its high resolution pic. This strain is a real strain on the country.

Mamta flu (strain H2N5): Spreads through bogus agitations and hatred for all development-related activities. Strain H2N5 is the only one that is virulent in the entire set of strains called TMC.

Jaya flu(strain H3N5): extremely virulent in its native state. Spreads via inflammatory speeches and through huge sandal collections.

Arnab flu (strain H1N5): the infected person may keep on raising his voice and poking a sharp object at 180 degrees to the horizontal repeatedly while speaking. Spreads via national television and once the strain is activated, the patient becomes uncontrollable.

Lalit Modi flu (strain H5N2): This strain is native to India, but is currently prevalent in South Africa. Feeds on money by the tons and thrives on publicity. CDC experts have told this blogger that this strain is a particularly persistent one. If it is removed from one country, it moves on to another and keeps cribbing like theres no tomorrow.

Hillary flu (strain H3N2): this strain destabilizes volatile regions by funding terrorist states and tolerating terrorism directed against democracies.