Indian politicians suffering from Karmic malnutrition

The verdict is out..politicians in India are indeed suffering. A study conducted by the Timbuktoo-based Institute of Karmic Studies has revealed that 9 out of every 10 politician in the country is suffering from what the institute terms a severe case of “self-induced Karmic malnutrition”.

The study spanning two years, conducted across the nation by renowned psyco-spiritualist Dr. Hammerschmidst, has thrown up some interesting findings that will be shared with readers in this article. Addressing a hurriedly called up press conference in Guwahati, Dr. Hammerschmidst said that this study will go a long way in “putting things in perspective”. “This is already harming the nation and if we don’t do something, the long term impact could be catastrophic for the whole region,” the eccentric doc said.

The study rated Indian politicians on the following parameters:
• The ability to take on work and complete it
• The passion to do quality work
• The ability to make a positive difference to the lives of people around them
• Belief in doing the right things at the right time
• Unwavering belief in the need to do things selflessly
• Subscription to the theory of greater common good
• Purity of intentions and actions
• The ability to invest ones thoughts, beliefs and actions in honest work

Indian politicians failed miserably on all these counts and were found to be deficient when it came to karma. “Let me put it this way. If all these guys were to die today, hell will have to conduct a common entrance exam that is tougher than the IIT Jee and IIM CAT put together to prevent overcrowding and collapse of the civic system there,” the doc said. “The karmic balance of these guys is as good as the assets managed by Lehman Bros.,” the doc added.

To rectify these deficiencies, Hammerschmidst has asked all politicians to start doing honest public work with a selfless attitude and invest in goodwill. Karmic malnutrition, according to him, could lead to other diseases that would prevent them from having a good life and lack of peoples’ goodwill. “Greed, dishonesty and power are words that need to be shunned. These leaders have to clothe their souls in a new attire, one that is drenched with the nectar of human kindness and generosity,” Hammerschmidst prescribed. “The new elections will provide a perfect opportunity for these guys to turn over a new and start afresh – they shouldn’t lose this opportunity,” he added.

Responses to the findings were also as interesting. The government chose to ignore it calling the study baseless while the opposition called it a ploy by the government to create a moral platform. 7 time MP Chavvani Lal says, “I believe only in one karma – that of minting money and grabbing power. I don’t need to see beyond that”.

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