Pak announces new package for USA

Pakistan has announced a new war on terror package for recession hit USA. Speaking to press in Karachi, Shah Mehmood Qureshi, Pakistani foreign minister said that the package would provide the much needed flexibility in managing expenses related to the ongoing war in parts of Pakistan and Afghanistan. "We have been told that the new administration wanted to cut corners in the war. We have now given them a set of options that are indeed cost effective and would help the new administration sell the war to a skeptical domestic audience," Qureshi said.

Heres an exclusive snapshot of various packages on offer:


Terms and conditions
# Pakistan government or any of its arms or the arms of its armed forces are not liable for any defect or deficiency in the service obtained under various packages and all dispute in this regard should be ignored
# Pak government is not making any offer and does not make any warranties or representation about the quality, merchantability, suitability or availability of the products or services included in these offers or about the participating establishments.
# Pakistan government or its armed forces shall not be liable for any loss or damage whatsoever that may be suffered, or for any causalities that may be suffered by US army or other wings as a result of availing of any of these offers.
# Pakistan reserves its absolute right to withdraw or alter any of the terms and conditions of the offer at any time without prior intimation to the US government or its armed forces.
# The offer is subject to force majeure events.
# Tax liability, if any will be borne by the US government.
# Deep strikes falling outside the purview of this agreement will be charged on a pro rata basis.
# Rates for each package will be published separately and are subject to change, subject to the economic condition of Pakistani army generals and government.

The US has meanwhile reacted angrily to the package. Pakistan's envoy in Washington was summoned and given a through dressing down by SoS Hillary Clinton. Hillary said that such packages were intended to sell something which US owns anyway and would not be accepted. "This is the heights of a terrible game of brinkmanship being essayed by a terrorist state and we will not give in," Hillary claimed. As a punishment, the Pakistani envoy was made to watch the tape of her husband denying any relationship with Monica Lewinsky 30 times after which the envoy collapsed and was dragged away.