Arnab Goswami invests in tool that helps husbands predict when they will be thrashed

Yes, you heard it right. Times Now’s editor in chief Arnab Goswami has bought a significant stake in a Bangalore based start-up that has developed a tool that warns husbands about an imminent thrashing from their better halves. The development was confirmed by a source close to Goswami on Saturday.

The start-up Allucient Tech is already selling an astrology app on Google Play that uses big data, sentiment analysis and past trends to determine your future. “That app is based on a comprehensive review of over
900 parameters fed into it over a period of time. But WT 300 (the app that warns husbands) is a lighter version of the main app. WT 300 analyses recent data based on your BP levels and other parameters to determine whether you are lying and based on the strength of the lie, it determines the consequences. In addition, it also analyses big data obtained from sources like your credit card bill, your extra-curricular activities, your recent and past interactions with your wife and the frequency with which you are thrashed to figure out when you will be pulped next,” a developer associated with the aap told Humor Unplugged.

After learning about the utility of WT300, Arnab decided to invest money earned from selling his food coupons in the black market in this venture. “As a matter of policy, we do not disclose details on who invests in our start-up but I can tell you that a prominent news editor who was being thrashed every hour on the hour has indeed invested in our concern. We are glad to have him on board. In addition to giving us working capital, he has also given significant inputs to enhance WT300. He was the one who suggested that the app should have a feature that notifies nearby hospital if the bleeding (post-thrashing) exceeds 30 percent of the net blood content in the body,” an Allucient spokesperson said. 

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