Indian government launches war on Monday

Government of India has decided to take proactive measures to limit and neutralize the affect of Mondays on its productive workforce. This blogger has learnt, through his sources that the government is likely to table a comprehensive bill on the floor of the house soon to ensure that employees are not unduly affected by Mondays.

The bill titled Monday (Protection and Management) Bill and Rules 2009 has been framed after a study by a committee into Monday morning blues. The committee headed by renowned Mondayologist Dr. Hammerschmidst came up with recommendations for the Indian government to improve the efficiency of the Indian workforce in the private sector and not the babus infesting government (for whom every day is like the last hour on Friday for their private sector counterparts).

“We have found that maximum heart and panic attacks happen on Mondays. The stress levels go out of the charts and people are simply too fatigued on Mondays. This is bad news since it affects the health of employees and can have significant short and long term impacts,” Hammerschmidst told this blogger using a telegram sent from a remote corner of UP where he is doing research on the impact of the recently installed dummies of Mayawathi on pigeon behavior in the area.

Highlights of the Monday bill include:
• Monday will be a compulsory half day
• Employees will be exempt from checking mails on Mondays
• No ‘nasty’ or ‘FYA’ mails to be sent on Friday evenings and Mondays
• Bosses should not go anywhere near their teams or send mails on Mondays i.e, they should remain incommunicado
• Compulsory breaks every 15 min

The bill is expected to sail smoothly in parliament.


Charu said…
Should we start a community on Facebook or a signature campaign for this bill to be passed ;)
Anonymous said…
even i was thinking on having Monday as a halfday
half day is wasted in checking the mails of the entire weekend
Apple said…
They should also introduce another substitute monday..wherein one friday is off ;)
Prayukth said…
This comment has been removed by the author.
Deepali said…
hey please do that Signature Campaign, I am sure will get overwhelming response for this :))
Deepali said…
hey please do that Signature Campaign, I am sure will get overwhelming response for this :))

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