Spiritual banking? Whats that?

Banking is the latest industry hit by the spiritual bug. Global FIs are now gearing up to launch products aimed at the religiously inclined consumer.

So what exactly is spiritual banking? It is basically a blend of trading, banking and securities exchange based on spiritual currency called Karma. Customers can accumulate Karma based on the good deeds that they do, which is credited to their account by a certified Karmic accountant. The Karmic exchange rate is a floating rate based on the exchange rate prevailing on the day Karma is deposited in a bank.

Guys with negative Karma will try and pull this rate down, while others will try and push the rates north. Karma can be freely traded subject to the condition that the currency has been stored in the customer’s account for atleast an year. All good deeds committed without selfish motives and with unbound goodwill qualify for Karmic investment. The customer must be able to convince the Karmic auditor about the genuineness of his or her claim and support it with relevant evidence.

Potential customers are extremely excited by the move. “I have been running an airline and wooing my girl for over a year now. I haven’t earned a penny in both deals and this is the time to encash all the good that I have been doing,” says Mess Wadia. According to Puppy Lahiri, “i haven’t brought out any albums in the last two years and have spared people from needless cacophony and this should alone make me a Karmic millionaire”.

Eye Bee Yen editor Rajcreep goes one step ahead and says “this was in the works for too long and we need to implement this soon. We need to become more morally conscious and spiritually cognizant. I mean just look at the type of breaking news that news channels are flaunting these days. The other day one channel claimed that someone from the opposition had stolen the PM’s pyjammas. The society needs to cleanse itself and this move has come at the right time”.

Others however are not so excited. “Will what i say on my blog be considered as a negative karma? If so I don’t believe in all this,” says actor Amir Khan. Him-mesh Race-mia is equally apprehensive when he says “if this takes off, I will have to quit acting and singing and go back to my old job of being a watchman and that’s gonna be tough..”

Whatever the apprehensions, spiritual banking is here to stay.


Apple said…
"Karmic exchange rate" sounds quite innovative.. ;)

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