Showing posts from May, 2013

Nation skeptical about Kapil Sibal's anti-fixing crusade

Working on new law to curb dishonest practices in sports said Kapil Sibal. We have collected some of the reactions the union law minister received as soon as he said that.

Friday fry: Greenpeace to honor Sunny Deol

Leading actor and the only man with arms weighing  a few kilos, Sunny Deol will be honored by global environment NGO, Greenpeace. A decision to this effect was taken at a hurriedly convened meeting of the organisation in Auckland yesterday. The meeting was convened in such a hurry that there were no snacks or beverages available at the venue during the meeting.

A press release issued by Greenpeace states “Indian actor Sunny Deol has been leading a multi-level campaign against the use of contraptions that deplete the water table (handpumps). In many of his movies, Sunny is portrayed as an angry young man who vents his anger out on many things, including equipment that are used to draw precious ground water from below the surface of the earth. His efforts are indeed laudable and his persistence in conveying this crucial message to a global audience in a simplified manner has won our eternal admiration and gratitude”.

Our Greenpeace source tells us that the special committee went throu…

Chinese man travelling with a tent detained at IGI, grilled by Arnab

A Chinese guy going by the name Kong Bi Rong was detained by Indian security agencies at Terminal 3 of IGI when he was found to be carrying a tent on his person.

Rong arrived in New Delhi by Air China’s 6 am flight today morning but was detained as he was found to be acting suspiciously. He was then taken aside and interrogated while cops went through his belongings and were shocked to find a collapsible tent. It may be remembered that Chinese PLA had used tents to stay on in Indian territory in Ladakh till a few days back.  That incident is still ripe in the memory of Indian security establishment which didn’t want to take any chances.

 “Any Chinese guy carrying a tent with him will be detained. What if the fellow pitches the tent in the airport and refuses to vacate till India dismantles more bunkers across the LAC? I cannot trust these folks and so we seized his tent and he has been handed over to these Chinese consulate in New Delhi after a thorough inquiry. We got Times Now’s A…

IPL spotgate update: went with gripe water and pacifier says cop who arrested Sreesanth

Cops had anticipated huge trouble while arresting Indian pacer S Sreesanth. The team that went into take him into custody had to carry Lego toys, couple of pacifiers, gripe water and some towels.

“As soon as we walked into his room,  he opened the door and was calm and composed initially. But when we told him that we have come to arrest him for cheating and criminal conspiracy related to the Indian Premier League matches, he broke down and started wailing at such a high pitch that a few flowerpots broke in the next room. The carpet down below went wet with his tears and the floor beyond that became slippery. That was followed by an attempt to dance by Sreesanth in order to confuse us. But we would have none of it. Few of us held him tightly, force fed him gripe water and closed his mouth with a pacifier, that’s when things went calm and we could take him away,” said a senior cop who was part of the team that arrested the pacer.

N Srinivasan’s marriage prospects unaffected 
After few n…

Nawaz Sharif’s victory in Pakistan elections is an inspiration: Madhuri Dixit

Pakistani politician Nawaz Sharif today declared victory in a historic election marred by violence and kite flying. This is been seen in some circles as a remarkable comeback for a leader once toppled in a military coup and sent into exile with a horrendous hairdo. Back home in India, come back queen and former actor Madhuri Dixit claimed that Nawaz Sharif’s victory shows that one can make an effective come back, anytime.

In an exclusive interview with Humor Unplugged, the dhak-dhak granny said that she was now more determined to make her 478th attempt at making a comeback in Bollywood. “I agree I have not been successful in returning to the form I was in, before I left Bollywood, but now I am more determined than ever to return to business and this time nothing, including bad scripts, lackluster direction or my own desperation to get back to Bollywood can stop me. I will be inspired by everything including the return of Sharif. The last time he was PM of Pakistan, I was ruling bollyw…

Friday fry: Rajdeep slapped by Simi Garewal

The Times of India reported a few days back that a 3,000-year-old Egyptian mummy, the pride of the state museum in Lucknow, was dying a slow death because officials were able to stop its continuing decay. The mummy, as old as Kashmiri fossil Syed Shah Geelani, is apparently of a 13-year-old girl, possibly from the period between the 22nd and 25th dynasties of Egypt, and was purchased by the museum in 1952.

As soon as our living botox mummy Simi Garewal heard about the plight of this mummy, she caught a flight and landed in Lucknow. She wanted to share her preservation secrets with museum authorities so that they could use them to preserve the rotting Egyptian mummy. Apparently Simi couldn't bear the sight of a fellow mummy going unpreserved.

Sources tell us that the nation’s leading mummy asked the authorities to order a list of 200 items which included seaweed juice, pothole water from Hawaii, 20 kg of powdered and refined industry grade botox and mineralised thorium. When the a…

Actual banners held by intruding PLA soldiers at LAC

During the recent Chinese intrusion, many of us saw a pic that showed PLA soldiers holding a banner asking Indian troops to go back. After the media took pics of this banner and returned to Delhi, the PLA soldiers came back with more banners. Only Humor Unplugged was able to take pics of these (since we had also pitched a tent there) and as always in public interest, we are posting them here...

Interesting disclaimer in latest Sunny Deol movie

Check out the last line in the poster right below the social media links. 

For Indian carriers, passengers are cash cows

With Indian government allowing airlines to charge extra for carrying check-in baggage and meals even in full-service carriers, a whole new set of charges will emerge. Airlines will now be able to milk customers at every step of their journey.

So what will happen in the future? What new charges will emerge and why would you need to book your ticket on EMIs? Humor Unplugged’s aviation expert Karmappa Jholl explores the Indian aviation scene and identifies new charges that carriers here will impose in the foreseeable future:

Attention charge: so that air hostesses will look at you atleast once. If you want them to smile or acknowledge your existence, you will have to pay extra. If you want them to come to your seat, each time you press the button to call them, your bank account will be debited. Experience pilot charge: If you want your plane to be piloted by an experience pilot, you will have to pay extra.Emergency evacuation demo charges: if you want to view the demo, you will have to …