Sidhartha V Mallya on Dinner with Simi Garewal...

Humor Unplugged presents Simi Garewal's exclusive interview with Sidhartha V Mallya...  


SG: Now that your small date with Deepika Padukone is over…do you feel weak? Do you feel subdued, tied or confused? It must have been tough. Are you crying deep inside? How do you feel right now? 

SVM: I feel…I feel…I feel noxious yewww what is that stinky smell and those fumes?

SG: pardon a moi that’s those chemicals they use to preserve my body. You see I am no longer all that young and need to use a mix of manure and mushroom extracts to keep my skin on. Anyway so how does it feel to have broken up with Deepika Padukone? Do you still miss her? Do you long to be with her? You poor little jalebi breaking up at such a tender age must have been terribly painful. Do you want some strawberry candy from Simi aunty?    

SVM: Hello lady, don’t make it sound so bad. We just had a fling and now we are back to being single and I ain't upset and I am feeling fine. But it seems like you need serious timeout in a rehab.

SG: How is your family reacting to this development? Did they hold your hand? Did you guys give each other group hugs? Did dad take you out on a long walk? Did mommy sing you a lullaby? Did Ramu Kaka let you water the garden? Oh dear! Oh dear! I feel so motherly right now (wipes a tear from her eyes)..

SVM: Gosh lady, take a chill pill. Nothing like that has happened. Dad is tied up with the Kingfisher Calender model hunt and mom is too busy partying to notice. The only family member who noticed it was my pet Chihuahua Bobo who took me out for a drink the other night. We don't have a Ramu Kaka anymore. Captain Gopinath's HR guys poached him few weeks back and he has joined Deccan 360 as a consultant and please don’t cry on me…your acidic tears are eating through my jeans.

SG: Oh that’s terrible. Such a shame on all humanity. Here is a tiny little boy betrayed by his lady love. Will you ever recover and be your cheerful little self again? Will the sun ever shine on your tiny lill garden of peace and sanity?    

SVM: You are freaking me out. Guards get this lady out of here before she starts giving me that Simi Garewal stare…

SG: Too late (Simi starts giving the oh! You should be feeling more miserable than a hyena on an Atkins diet look. Mallya Jr. faints and is carried away by a bunch of guys from the UB group).  

Comments

Sairam said…
"Will the sun ever shine on your tiny lill garden of peace and sanity"

It's simi garewal, all right.
Do you sit through it :)
Red Handed said…
I AM SOOOOOO HAPPY THAT I BUMPED INTO THIS POST..

indiblogger sure is a good bloke :P

That was one great read sir!

earned a follower!
Hey Sai :) no yaar haven't had the misfortune yet...but can reconstruct her behavior thanks to the old memories i have of rendezvous (round-e-poo ;) with simi and ofcourse Cyrus Sahukar is a big inspiration :)
Hi RH :) thanks a ton buddy for joining Club HU :) watchout for more coming your way :) members only :)
Raji said…
thats a good humor right there :)LOL!
Thanks again Raji glad you liked it :)
Nisarg said…
You could do better.The topic had so much potential.His girlish voice,weird accent(certainly not and english accent) and his pretentions about being 'desirable'.His dandy like nature and his investment into p.r to build an image of a cool, happening playboy but alas you let it slip by.
Nisarg said…
You could do better.The topic had so much potential.His girlish voice,weird accent(certainly not and english accent) and his pretentions about being 'desirable'.His dandy like nature and his investment into p.r to build an image of a cool, happening playboy but alas you let it slip by.
Sorry buddy for letting you down...promise will compensate in the next interview :)
Unknown said…
PJ!!!! That was funny!!

Satish..:)

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