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Showing posts from March, 2011

If India wins the World Cup

Some people have claimed they will do all kinds of things if India lifts the ICC Cricket World Cup. Here are a few things some others can do to inspire the Indian team.

If India lifts the cup…
• A Raja should return the 3000 bribe he took and the telcos should return 60000 crores
• Emran Hashmi and Uday Chopra should quit acting
• Arnab Ghoswami should start News Hour with a positive news
• Amar Singh should get a plastic surgery done to look like a human being
• Sharad Pawar should quit politics and stick to ICC
• Advaniji should retire to his native in Karachi and take over as caretaker of Jinnah mausoleum
• The Indian government should publish the names of Swiss Bank account holders
• Suresh Kalmadi should do his version of “suicide mausijee”. The only difference being that he should actually commit suicide towards the end
• No powercuts in Bangalore in May
• Yedurappa to donate 10 days of bribes collected by him to the Japan Earthquake relief fund
•  Bharkha Dutt should stop being…

Facebook slowing down evolution: expert

In a damning revelation, noted evolutionary expert and all round nice guy Dr Hammerschmidst has claimed that social networking site Facebook was putting the brakes on evolution and the ill effects of this on mankind will emerge over the next 50 years.

Hammerschmidst has based his study on research conducted on over 100,000 subjects including mice, over the last 4 years. The findings of his study, accessed exclusively by your favorite blog, reveal that since the birth of Facebook, the number of mutations occurring per 10000 people has hit an al time low of .3. According to the doc, this means that from now on there will less opportunities for mankind to develop new features and evolve and adapt according to changing survival needs.

What does this really mean doc, we asked. And the reply startled us. “Facebook will turn into the equivalent of the comet that destroyed the dinos. You see irrespective of what we do, our world is getting hotter and there are other changes taking place thats…

Game over Muammar Gaddafi...

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Dont let the door hit you on your way out...

Team BCCI will find it tough to win World Cup 2011

Humor Unplugged’s very own psychoanalyst Dr. Hammerschmidst has analyzed the events leading to the ICC World Cup 2011 in detail and prepared a report that explains what went wrong from the BCCI team’s perspective. The report has been submitted to the BCCI and the Indian government. The opposition has already asked the Indian government to constitute a JPC to investigate the episode.

According to the report, the BCCI’s cricket team’s chances in the World Cup have been reduced by many blunders committed by various stakeholders in the last 50 days. Your favorite blog has managed to obtain a copy of the report by bribing a senior union minister. Here are the main reasons why Indian team will have it tough in the 2011 edition of cricket World Cup.

* Comparing the current team with its 1983 counterpart: “Definitely not a good idea. Simply shows that we just don’t want to move on from that win. This mistake has been repeated before every World Cup since 1983 and the team could never live up…

P J Thomas wont quit...

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Exclusive Facebook conversation

Kenyan team to fly out of the ICC World Cup 2011

Humor Unplugged reporting from the ICC World Cup 2011. After receiving an SOS from its team in the World CUP, the Kenyan government has decided to evacuate its cricket team. It may be remembered that Team Kenya had repeatedly suffered crushing defeats at the hands of various teams in the competition. Senior officials in the Kenyan embassy at New Delhi have confirmed the development with one official revealing that the Indian government has already been approached to assist the evacuation effort.

When a flummoxed Humor Unplugged reporter asked the official to elaborate, he said “Our team is in dire straits and there are no two ways about it. The team is trapped in the ICC World Cup and we have requested the Indian government to help us evacuate our team from the event. India has extensive experience in pulling its citizens out from dangerous situations in the past and we are relying on this to help us move our team out,” the official said. “I want to remain as anonymous as the IT depar…