Mumblers to lead Indian delegation to Pakistan: composite dialogue on the anvil

India has decided to send a delegation led by mumbling stalwarts Yash Chopra and Jaswant Singh for talks with Pakistan. The decision was taken at a high level meeting chaired by external affairs minister S M Krishna on Thursday. Sources in the ministry have told Humor Unplugged that the two will be leading a delegation to Islamabad soon to discuss the ‘other issues’ raised by Islamabad. 

“Pak has been ranting about the need for composite talks. So while channel 1 comprising of foreign secretaries of two countries will be talking terror, Jaswant and Yash Chopra will initiate composite dialogue with Pakistan,” our mole in the external affairs ministry told us over a off the record chat.

The two luminaries of the film world and mole politics, Yash and Jaswant have been known to keep the audience confused for hours with their mumbling. Their utterances are not just hard to decipher but the stony expression on their faces negates any attempt to figure out whats on their mind.  

“After one or two rounds Pakistanis will give up when they realize what we have done. They will then fall back on channel 1 and we will have our way. Even if Jaswant and Yash are silent, you will not be able to know anything. When they start talking, I have seen reporters trying everything to find out what these two want to say. One guy went to the extent of attending a lip reading class to understand Jaswant better…but he ended up as a mime after failing to decipher the moleman,” our mole says.

Right now only FBI has the equipment to decipher sub and ultra sonic mumbling and Pakistan wont be able to gain access to it anytime soon. Both Jaswant and Yash Chopra were offline and unavailable for chat when Humor Unplugged checked their status on Skype.

Comments

Anonymous said…
You should've included several other personalities from the Mumbai's Page Three-Psuedo Secularist-Arm Chair Critic circuit (eg. Shabana Azmi, Javed Akhtar, Mahesh Bhatt, Shahruckh Khan, etc) in the back channel dialogue idea. Pakistanis would be very happy and satisfied with whatever suggestion these luminaries provide!
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