Showing posts from November, 2009

Pak planning massive celebrations to commemorate 26-11

Pakistan is planning a massive ceremony to commemorate the success of one its biggest overseas terrorist operations. 26-11 once again showcased the cowardly side of Pakistan, wherein it dreads the prospect of a full fledged war with India and therefore prefers to fight a proxy one to keep India engaged. This pic shows a dress rehearsal for the ceremony happening in Karachi port from where the demons of 26-11 started their journey of mayhem. The ceremony will be attended by the same cowards from Pak army and navy who backed the plan, handlers of the terrorists, top brass of lashkar and jaish and the Chinese ambassador among others. As part of the ceremony, a fake expedition (that will travel upto the maritime boundary of Pakistan in Arabian sea) will be launched by Pak navy chief.

Pak to issue origin cards to terrorists

Pakistan has decided to issue special cards to terrorists who have been trained by the biggest sponsor of terror in the world. These cards, to be issued by the foreign ministry will make the holders eligible for obtaining special privileges, whenever they visit Pakistan. The decision was taken after it came to light that the two terrorists arrested by FBI in connection with plotting terror attacks against India and Denmark had received military training in Pakistan, in addition to the usual indoctrination from mountain mullahs.

“Everyday and I mean every single day, some terrorist is arrested in some part of the world and guess what all those guys are from Pakistan. It has become so much difficult for us to keep track of the amount of terrorists we are training and this card program will help us do exactly that. These guys are making us proud and this is the least the government of Pakistan can do,” screamed Pakistan’s loud mouth foreign minister Shah Mehmood Qureshi, who was so loud …

Funny images: focus on Obama

Obama returning after selling his spine to the Chinese for an undisclosed amount.

Hasho, meo soldo myo spino to the chineso..Obama is telling the Japanese emperor

When you dont have a spine, lifting anything is a problem: Obama seems to be saying.

Pakistan has launched a new Urban Mass Transit System to free its cities from traffic congestion...

The new age traveler: with airlines reducing the per capita luggage allowance, passengers are adopting newer methods to sneak more baggage this pic, an unknown passenger shows the latest concealing baggage in his turban

Now this one has gone too far..after making an 8 year-old drive at 125 kmph for record sake, now they have started pushing pets to the limit. This dog was made to drive at 130 kmph for bagging an entry into Guinness Records...Menaka Gandhi is fuming...

Santa goes underwater...

Obama gets it from an Indian journo...

After asking China to monitor the progress of Indo-Pak talks, US has now asked China to judge various reality shows that are appearing on Indian television. This request was made in a letter to Chinese Premier Hu or whatever his name is on Tuesday night by Obama as the US was leaving China after concluding his tour of that country.

In his letter, Obama says "we are worried about the quality of content that is generated in Indian reality shows that bring forth the worst in the form of competition driven madness. We have already removed our spines to please the dictatorship in your country and would now request you and your government of zombies to look into this issue at the earliest".

Meanwhile on board Air Force one, when a journo asked Obama as to how China had been appointed the monitor of South Asia, a puzzled Obama said "China stands for many things today - melamine contaminated milk, lead contaminated toys, spurious drugs, currency manipulation, interference in th…

David Coleman Headley: new tourism brand ambassador

David Coleman Headley, the guy who is on the lips of every intelligence guy in town, will soon be appointed as the tourism department's new brand ambassador. A consensus on this has been arrived and the decision could come as soon as this weekend, sources close to the tourism ministry said.

"This guy has visited every tourist hotspot in the country and the intelligence guys tell us that we the department could promote what they call terror tourism by taking visitors on the route taken by Headley in India. We may even have look alikes of Rahul Bhatt and other bollywood personalities who have met Headley to greet the tourists and act as guides during the visit," a senior tourism department official told this blogger.

Meanwhile the intelligence agencies in India, who are as alert as a hyena on a tranquiliser overdose, are now on a mission to trace his historic journey in India. According to sources, they have already visited over 40 cities and towns and are likely to visit…

Bal Thackrey has lost it -

Bal Thackrey, is a insane unpatriotic two penny politician who wants to divide the nation at every available instance. Our correspondent confronted the clown on his remark on Indian Idol's the exclusive...

RS: Whats wrong with you now? How could you insult a national icon?
BT: He is not bigger than me. I am the supreme dude, the uncle of Raj Thackrey, the leader of guys who protested against Kareena's bare back, I am the guy whose mouth is bigger than his brains...I am the leader of the Marathi Manoos...who is Tendulkar when compared to me??

RS: You are nothing but a Manhoos...a clown and a two penny politician who wants to win votes by pawning his soul. They have got your name right..Bal Thackrey - you haven't grown up yet..
BT: Thank you. When I was a kid my mom wanted me to grow up and grow a beard and half her prayers have been answered so far. By the way don't I look cool with these goggs?

RS: You have put a gogg on your brain also and thats why you ar…

Who proved what this week…

Tendulkar: If you are god, you can choose your retirement date
Headley: That our national security and intelligence apparatus is woefully ill-equipped to detect and neutralize terror plots directed against the country…for the nth time
A Q Khan: That no matter how much muck comes out of the nuke proliferation saga, US and IAEA will feign ignorance on Pakistan’s stellar role in making the world unsafe
Manu Sharma: That if you are rich and connected, you can get away with anything
Ajmal Kasab: That the life span of a terrorist captured in action is more than that of a average Indian
Raj Thackrey: That anyone can get away with issuing threats to a PSU bank
Kareena Kapoor: That Shiv Saniks love her back…and dont want the world to see it
Kevin Rudd AKA dud: That you can talk business to a country while its citizens are being killed in your own country

Pak to guarantee employment for terrorists

Taking a leaf from India’s rural employment guarantee scheme, Pakistan has decided to launch a similar program for terrorists operating from its soil in the near future. The move received a verbal agreement at an emergency cabinet meet called by PM Gillani in Islamabad yesterday and will be operationalized as soon as a bill on the same is passed by Parliament.

Tentatively christened the Pakistani Employment Scheme for Terrorists and other Expendable Resources (PESTER), the program is targeted against terrorists who are currently on the bench and are up to no good as far as Pakistan is concerned. “These guys who are fed and clothed by us with US money are turning against us with each passing day. With snow blocking all passes to India in Kashmir and reduction in action on the Afghan front, many terrorists have nothing to do and so are using their weapons and skills against us. Once this program is implemented, every terrorist will be able to work for atleast 100 days a year and that wi…

Funny images for the week gone by

A bunch of folks testing the beta version of guys bra to be launched soon in select markets.

Sign of the times

Obama's stature after he accepted a undeserving Nobel peace prize

As recession ends love is back with a bang..

Any answers

Raj Thackrey - India's gift to Australia

Raj Thackrey, India’s very own Taliban-minded racist clown will be traveling to Australia soon. This move comes after the visiting Australian PM Kevin Rud (aka the dud) made a special request on this count to his Indian counterpart.

Sources in the Minister of External Affairs while confirming the request, told this blogger that the same was under active consideration at the highest level. “We may export Raj to Australia as per the Aussie PMs request. Australia it seems is keen on getting a certified racist to steer its internal racist polices and provide a primer for bringing all racist groups under one roof to act in synergy to perpetrate hate crimes,” a senior official said on Friday.

“People like Raj Thackrey belong to countries like Australia and Pakistan. They have lot in common and propagate a culture of divisiveness based on skin color, religion, ethnicity or even the langots they wear. Raj Thackrey could have become the PM of Australia or an Army Chief in Pakistan, if he was not…

Al Qaeeda recruitment ads

Al Qaeeda, the world leader in terror, is expanding operations to new business territories. For driving this expansion, we are looking at recruiting enthusiastic individuals for ‘c’ level positions with the right combination of qualification and experience. You think you fir the bill, we are waiting for you?

Vacancy code Asp 05
CEO: Chief Execution Officer: Responsible for execution of hostages and elements hostile towards the ideology of Al Qaeeda or its affiliates. This position is based out of Kandhahar and the incumbent will report directly to the regional head (elimination). The candidate must have worked for over 10 years in similar capacity with terror groups having operations in at least 5 countries.

Vacancy code ASP 06
Chief Terror Officer (CTO): Responsible for coordinating suicide attacks against enemy elements and targets. The incumbent will work with affiliated groups to execute terror plots strategized by level 3 leadership of Al Qaeeda. This challenging position will be …

Maoist interview

Ho Ki Chin is a maoist by profession. A product of MIT (Maoist Institute of Terror), Chin is the face of maoist terror and heads a module that operates in the Bengal-Orissa corridor. Our correspondent Rajcreep caught up with the dude and asked him about the role that elements like him are playing in furthering the cause of China.

RS: Struggle against poverty and neglect? If you are fighting against social injustice, your means are not right…the path that you have adapted is also wrong.
HC: It’s a war that we are fighting…we are up against a totalitarian regime that doesn’t belive in social justice and we were forced to take up arms…

RS: And who exactly provides you these weapons, isn’t it China?
HC: Yea they provide moral and ammo support to us. They also supply Chinese noodles, contaminated milk, toys and cheap and inferior hardware.

RS: Not to mention rotten ideology. How is it that they recruit guys like you? Where do they find these anti social elements?
HC: We are into campus rec…

The week ahead for politicians by Deadpan Hoochwala

Aries: indulging in selling flood relief contracts will rake in the much needed moolah. Flinging a slipper in parliament is not advised as the same could bounce back to you. Drink extra ginger beer to attract good fortune.

Taurus: Time to switch parties. Stars indicate that a ministerial berth is due in addition to stay in a posh 5 star hotel. Some hard bargaining could even fetch an unexpected international vacation for your family. Keep a Jayalalitha mask in your bedroom to scare away evil spirits.

Gemini: your other face will be exposed this week. DO NOT visit a flood affected area as a forced wardrobe malfunction is on cards. Your PA is channeling some of the bribes meant for you to his bank account. Go for a movie with family instead and maintain a low profile eitherway.

Cancer: Get yourself admitted to a prominent hospital and stay there for a while…a CBI raid or some form of legal discomfort is indicated. Wear a Himesh Reshamiya CD to keep evil eye at arms length.

Leo: Your po…

Funny images for the week gone by

A Chinese intruder caught in the act

Pakistan is really serious on the war on terror...this dude is their mascot

Pakistan's ambassador to US reacts after the Headly incident came to light. Pakistan has been exposed for the nth time as the biggest sponsor of terrorism worldwide...

Clown flu

Bill Clinton keeping himself busy

This reminds me of Pakistan and Taliban

Now they should issue fatwah against

How much does it take to issue a fatwa against something that is really a pain? It it that tough? The Mullahs Association of India thinks so...First of all this blogger feels that blogging is any day better than fatwaing ;) but then since some of the mullahs are on the bench at this point of time, they should revisit the fatwa list and issue fatwa only against those issues which are essential...

Here are some of the things that they should issue a fatwa against:

* Pakistan for 26-11, exporting terror into India
* Politicians who neglect public service
* Mayawathi for squandering public money
* Raj Thackerey for pursuing divisive minded politics
* Pramod Mutalik
* Ramlingaraju
* Companies imposing dress code
* Recession
* China
* Russia for jacking the price of Admiral Gorshov
* Black marketers
* The Taliban
* Osama Bin Laden
* Human trafficking
* Poachers
* Money launderers
* Pirates
* Drug marketers
* Child marriage
* Sexual harrasment

Come on guys...if you have the guts to stand up for what i…

Popular Halloween costumes

* Obama’s nobel prize
* Mayawathi statue
* Arnab’s pencil
* Jet Airways Pilot (if you are attending a party organized by Naresh Goyal)
* Telemarketer
* Desh Drohi CD
* Reality show judge
* Mamta Banerjee (if you are attending a party organized by Tatas)
* Andrew Symonds
* Ramlinga Raju (if you are attending a SEBI party)
* Hilary Clinton (if you are attending a bachelor party sponsored by Bill)
* Birth certificate (if you are attending a party organized by bollywood actresses)

Chidambaram cracks a joke...

This ones gotta be the joke of the week..."Chidambram threatens Pakistan", says ToI...
What exactly is the intention behind propagating such rhetoric? The entire world, including Pakistan, has seen how we taught pak a lesson last time it pushed terrorists into India...the home minister should be wise enough to stop issuing statements that cannot be matched by deeds...FOR ONCE, FOR INDIA'S SAKE, DO SOMETHING INSTEAD OF SIMPLY OPENING YOUR MOUTH...

13-12, 26-11…missed opportunities galore

Chavvani Lal, heads the Response Cell of India’s defense ministry. In this capacity, he is responsible for crafting India’s response to a terror attack schemed and executed by elements supported by India’s enemy nations. In an exclusive interview with Rajcreep, Chavvani describes his role and throws some light on India’s response strategy in the event of a terror attack..

RS: What exactly is your job profile?
CL: I head a cell within the defense ministry that oversees plans to discourage foreign nations from attacking India directly or through proxy means. By that I mean that it is my responsibility to prepare a strong response to plots hatched to harm our strategic or other resources in India or abroad. I have to ensure that such events are never repeated again and to teach the enemy nation a lesson they will never forget.

RS: So what is it that you do in office? Considering the fact that we have never heard of you or your ministry..
CL: Nothing much, me and my team constantly check our…

Images for the week gone by

Disruption of internet services brought some mullahs out of their lairs..these guys looking absolutely bored didnt know what to do when their modems went silent on Friday...

Pak interiror minister Rehman Malik's assistants choose a mask for him..

Donkey Riding licenses issued by Pakistan to Mullahs...notice the difference in the appearence of the guy in the pic and in real life..

Pak armymen loading supplies meant for millitants operating from Pakistan-Occupied Kashmir

Pak millitants on the bench - thanks to recession

A cure for foot in the mouth disease developed by scientists in Singapore...Pak should use this to cure motormouth Rehman Malik

Simply a good wrap it all up