India to reciprocate to Pak overtures

India has finally decided to repay Pakistan in kind for its efforts to increase the population of terrorists in India. Starting next week, Indian government will be sending one stray dog into Pakistan for every intruder pushed into India by that country. This decision was taken at a high level meeting organized by Home Minister Chidambaram in New Delhi last week.

“We are indeed having a problem with the militants and stray dogs. By pushing stray dogs into Pakistan, at least one problem will be solved,” a senior home ministry official told this blogger over tea. The strays for the job will be sourced from cities like Bangalore that are dealing with the stray dog menace. Sources say that the National Intrusion Monitoring Agency will coordinate with the National Stray Dog Management Agency headed by none other than drama mom Menaka Gandhi for this project.

The project will be funded by a multilateral donor in the initial days and will be extended to areas bordering China in the future. Increasing stray dog population is putting a strain on many urban development programs such as the National Urban Renewal Mission. The government was already contemplating more measures to curb the menace that is increasingly threatening the delicate fabric of urban sanity in many cities.

Experts have pointed out that the number of stray dog attacks on VIPs has seen a sharp rise in the last few years with several MPs asking for Z category security to keep canine assailants at bay. “There was a MP in our neighborhood who was subject to forced wardrobe malfunction thanks to a coordinated attack by a set of canine miscreants. Though we were happy with the attack, in hindsight, we do feel that the attack was avoidable and there are other ways of grabbing the MPs attention” secretary of a local resident welfare association told this blogger.

“We will be choosing the best of strays, the ones that have a history of attacking people…they will be code named after prominent militants and pushed into Pakistani territory at various points on the international border. If needed BSF will provide covering fire for such missions,” the senior bureaucrat told this blogger.

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