Taliban launches home shopping network

Taliban Pakistan Ltd. has launched a new shopping network to sell branded merchandise via the web and TV channels. The new network called Taliban Shopping Network helps customers order items from the comfort of their homes and offices.

Here are some of the items on offer.

Home Mullah Kit: Want to turn into a local Mullah? Wish to go around and preach pre-Stone Age philosophies? Home Mullah Kit is the thing for you. It comes with a fake 67 day old beard, inflatable donkey, aging cream and a Fatwa diary (to help you track those fathwas you have issued) to transform into Mullah almost overnight.

The kit comes with a 30-day Taliban guarantee. If you don’t turn into a moth-eateb mullah in 30 days, Taliban will refund your money.

ITEM CODE: TSN 3049
Price Pak Rs: 3456

Issuing Fatwa for Dummies: Gain from the wisdom of over 300 donkey riding stupor mullahs spread across Pakistan. This book prepared after extensive research over the last 5 years contains tips on how to:

• Spot a issue
• Mobilize public opinion
• Issue Fatwa and gain publicity
• Issue online fatwa

If you order now, you will also get a special CD containing a fatwa style guide. This will help you prepare and issue your very own fatwa within 7 days.

ITEM CODE: TSN 1549
Price Pak Rs: 799

Threatening video kit: Designed for those who want to prepare and host their own threatening videos on the net. This kit will help you record threatening videos to target anyone including USA, Israel, UK, your future father-in-law or even your neighborhood grocer. The kit contains over 35 scripts, 10 blank DVDS to record your videos, 5 MP high res camcorder and a pocket microphone. The kit will help you record your threatening videos on the move.

Order now and you will receive a limited edition exclusive video of Osama threatening his donkey.

ITEM CODE: TSN 1467
Price Pak Rs: 999
To order any one of these items online, log on to http://karmicsoliloquy.blogspot.com/

Comments

Apple said…
oh boyy..
i wonder how u have not been in trouble for this one..
ESPPPPECIALLY "Home Mullah Kit"
This comment has been removed by the author.

Whats trending